The Bitch is Back!

Wow, it's been awhile.  I became disheartened with writing a blog because I realized I was the most uninteresting person in the world, I vowed to go out and live!  Well, as always, I let my fear stop me from really living.  I don't know what's wrong with me, I don't know why I can't have an intimate relationship, I don't know why I can't be present and emotionally present in my friendships, I don't know why I can't follow my dreams and just write, write, write.  Why am I so afraid all of the time?  What happened to me to put this fear in my heart?  But I'm putting this out there in the world, I am tired of being so damn afraid all of the time, I'm tired of closing myself off from everyone so scared of being hurt, you know what?  Fuck it, really living means putting yourself out there and if I get hurt, if I get rejected I'll just have to feel it and move the fuck on.  Use it in my writing, anything, anything not to be this dead inside anymore.  I am alive and I will live because life is for the living.  I am aware, I am present, I am alive.