New World Order

It is the third week of my layoff and I feel I have acquitted myself well. Oh, there has been lots of lazing about and eating, but I feel like I've made real in-roads on my writing. I can see my collection of short stories really taking shape and I'm going to participate in NanoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month, which starts November first, and I'm extremely excited about that. I have an idea that I love and I feel I can sustain for 50,000 words (the goal) and I'm actually itching to start but I'm going to wait until the first, so it won't feel like I'm cheating. I feel excited and rejuvenated, so much to the point that I'm trying to plot a way I can do this until I'm finished with my collection of stories (ideally I'd like ten) and my novel is finished and ready to be published. How do writers get paid to write? That's the dream, the dream I've been too scared to fully pursue, because what if I failed? What if I found out I wasn't good enough? What if I was good enough and still no one was interested? But enough with that, I'm ready to take a risk, ready to finally live. I never knew that having a purpose felt quite like this. I feel amazing and I hope it transfers to how I treat other people because I want everyone to feel as good as I do. This moment is beautiful, this moment is all I have.

It's Me again!

So, today was the first workday of my lay-off and...it was a bit weird. The weather was mystifyingly beautiful so I was grateful that I wasn't cooped up in the office not enjoying it, but I feel I struggled in finding things to keep me occupied. I'm a person that doesn't do well with free time, I idle and I eat. I have to find ways to occupy my time so that I don't resort to old habits, oh, and I have to fight against my natural inclinations of gluttony and sloth for three months. This should be interesting. I know I should probably fill my time with museums, art galleries, bike rides, but I most likely won't. I would love to be that person who gets up in the morning and decides to go for a five mile hike, or to get on the train and visit the Art Institute downtown, but I love my creature comforts and it is like pulling teeth to get me to do something outside of my normal routine and if someone tells me I need to try something different? I roll my eyes and proceed to not listen to them as hard as I can. How does one fight against their nature? I want to be awesome active person, but it's so much easier to just read a book or watch a television show. How does one fake it till they make it?