On Thoughts

How do you get your mind to be at ease? My mind is a constant carousel of what is worrying me; money, school, financial aid, dating, my parents, etc., and it's driving me mad! What aids can I use to calm myself? Where will I find serenity? Can it be found? Or is this just what it means to be an adult?

On the New Happy

The new happy is simply being content. And from moment to moment, I am content. I finally feel like I'm doing something to make positive things happen in my life. And as crazy as it sounds, even if none of the things I want to happen come to fruition, it's enough that I actually went after them. I've always been so afraid, afraid of trying, of failing, of succeeding, but now, the fear is losing it's grip on me, and d@#!, does it feel good. Now, I'm not trying to claim that suddenly I'm a fun, fearless female, but I'm not so afraid to look the fool anymore. I'm not so afraid to put my emotions on the table and have people examine them, I'm not so afraid of the potential I have inside of me. This new movement within my heart is giving me a peace I've never had before and it's absolutely inspiring. Yes, from moment to moment, I am content with being me. I can't think of a better way to be.

Telegram from the braindead

I am working 50 hours a week. STOP. I will be working this schedule for the foreseeable future. STOP. Why do I always seem to get jobs that turn me into a workaholic? STOP. I currently have no energy or wherewithal to leave the house unless it's to go to work. STOP. I fear I won't be able to get ahold of my emotions and I may rage out at work. STOP. Someone send help posthaste. STOP. Help in the form of another job. STOP.